We are often all too aware of our insecurities. You might not like the width of your waist, the scar on your forehead, or the color of your teeth. You might not be proud of your wardrobe or style anymore, or perhaps the way you walk, or even the way you struggle to trust people immediately. If we asked you, you could probably come up with hundreds of little things you don’t like about yourself. But there would be absolutely no value or worth in asking that question. This is because when you ran out of the issues you thought you already knew, you would start to make them up on the spot. You would start to be incredibly self-critical to a depressing degree. This wouldn’t be because you are somehow the most depressing person on Earth. Everyone could do this. The human mind seemingly has no shortage of ways to confirm its inadequacy to itself.
But does that mean those inadequacies are true? No, it absolutely doesn’t. Building self-security can help you understand that, and grow your self esteem. But you need to know how to calibrate it well, more than any simple self-help advice you’ve heard thousands of times. With our advice, we hope you will find some new perspective:
Love Your Flaws
Loving your flaws is step one in feeling secure about yourself. If you have a birthmark or scarring, you should celebrate that as part of you, or perhaps use it as a sign of strength, or take pride in the difficulties you may have experienced, as you are the fantastic person you are now because of that. The Japanese art of ‘Kintsugi’ surrounding the drinking of tea rituals shows that if a pot is broken, it must not be thrown out. Instead, it must be lovingly repaired, and given even more sentimental value thanks to the character and history it now contains. It’s a beautiful idea, and if applied to you, can help you feel much better about yourself. This is much more attainable and has much more warmth than worrying about an unattainable beauty standard.
But Don’t Be Afraid To Change
But the previous advice doesn’t mean you shouldn’t feel pride in helping yourself feel at the top of your game. This might be through enhancing your gorgeous smile using dental implants, working to keep a healthy weight relative to you, or switching up your style from time to time in the interest of celebrating yourself. So long as you do it for healthy reasons, changing yourself now and then can be an exceedingly competent manner of loving yourself.
Sure you might have a larger waistline than you might like, but you might have radiant skin. Sure your hair might be falling out, but you can still look beautiful rocking a head scarf or you still have an absolutely wonderful makeup style. Be grateful for what you have, focusing on what you love about yourself rather than your negatives. If a negative feedback loop can happen in your mind, you can be sure a positive one has just as much strength if you allow it.
With these tips, self-security can be attainable.